On 3/30/2019 1:46 PM, AK wrote:
I bought a bicycle tail light.

One of the cautions was rather funny.

The product is only slightly waterproof, please do not take it for diving.

:-)

Andy


Andy:

This kind of thing is not new.

( Taken from "The Journal of Irreproducible Results" Vol. 36 Jan/Feb 1991 pp. 21
- 26 via "IEEE Spectrum" Aug 1993.)

THIS IS A 100% MATTER PRODUCT: In the unlikely event that this merchandise
should contact Antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion WILL result.

WARNING: This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe,
including the products of other manufactures, with a force proportional to the
product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance
between them.

HANDLE WITH EXTREME CA This product contains minute electrically charged
particles moving at velocities in excess of 500,000,000 miles per hour.

ADVISORY: There is an extremely small, but non zero, chance that, through a
process known as "Tunneling" this product may spontaneously disappear from its
present location and reappear at any random place in the universe. The
manufacturer will not be responsible for damage or inconvenience that may result.

NOTE: The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a
"gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power
can not, therefore, be permanently guaranteed.

ATTENTION: Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the
consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of 99.9999999999%
empty space.

COMPONENT EQUIVALENCY NOTICE: The subatomic particles (Electrons, Protons,
Neutrons etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable
respect as those used in the products of other manufactures, and no claim to the
contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.

IMPORTANT NOTICE TO THE PURCHASER: The entire physical universe, including this
product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should
another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that
universe cannot be guaranteed.


John


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